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Most of us, constantly keep thinking, remembering, and planning for future.
Thinking: "God, why me?... will I get what I want?... how should I handle my colleaugues?...should I say it... I hope I don't hurt him/her/mom/dad... but if I don't... Oh god!
Remembering: Good memories, fun times, painful events. More often we keep remembering painful memories, multiplying our burden and misery of life.
Planning for future: If I get promotion then plan A, if not then plan B and if plan B fails then a backup plan C etc...
Our mind just never stops. We keep working hard, pushing our boundaries, achieving, struggling with success and failure.
Then after we've achieved the basic level of success we wanted like buying a house, getting the desired promotion etc... there comes a stage when we are filled with more desires but still empty somewhere within. Achievement fills us with pride and some more vacuum at the same time. This desire to fill the vacuum sooner or later becomes a need. And this need, is what I believe Maslow in his theory of needs, called the self-actualisation need.
We sometimes don't realize this need, or ignore this need. Most of us seem to make one mistake, we keep waiting for all the needs in the lower layers of the pyramid to be fulfilled to justify our want to act, and dedicate ourselves to fulfill the need at the top of the pyramid. Need, comfort and luxury are relative terms. Items/wants keep changing, our new standard of living ensures that our relativity to the new wants, stays the same - a need. No matter how many lower level needs we keep satisfying a new need of the same category will emerge. Like you earlier wanted a bike, then a car, then an expensive car and so on. We then misunderstand these needs are 'stressing' us. However, the fact is that, not these needs but the self actualization need - 'the vacuum' is our stress. If we simultaneously keep satisfying this need, or in other words supplying some material to fill up this vacuum we will not get stressed about any need in the lower level level of the pyramid.
All that we need to do is make an effort to understand ourselves with a peaceful mind. Getting a peaceful mind is not easy, is it? Well, it is not, but we don't need to be as peaceful as Gautam Buddha to understand ourselves. So, it is easy, to get 'enough' peace. All those who think better in their bathrooms just have to realize that it is that time they can use to take a look at their reflection. I hope you did not take that literally. On reflecting, you will realize that somewhere all of us have the following set of needs: creating an identity of their own i.e. the need to be respected in society, creating social difference n on n on... When we start thinking on these lines, these ideas, thoughts, and needs start racing through your mind in the 5th gear. Then we are out of the bathroom (out of our solitary moment) and we again get busy satisfying the temporary and more superficial needs. Why do most of us only end up thinking about it. Well one of the prime reasons is we don't know how to get started.
The second underlying reason is that the temporary needs we choose to satisfy first include satisfaction to our loved ones too, unlike in the case of our self actualization need. None of our family, friends or work members would really understand our self actualization need and so do we not understand theirs. Now that's because we never share and respect each others self actualization need. Or may be not everyone around you has reached a stage where they feel the same amount of vacuum within them as you feel, or may be there is more vacuum in them but they do not have an eye to identify it. Have faith in yourself. Getting started to satisfy your self actualization need is really as easy or difficult as planning for a movie or shopping. For e.g. if you've been able to just identify that you want to make social difference in the society then reach out to any of the sources you reach out to plan a movie, i.e. newspaper or phone or internet. Just call your local 'yellow pages' and ask for NGOs in your area or log on to Google and search for NGOs in your area. Then call some NGOs just like you call in theatres for movie bookings. Get the required info and visit some of the NGOs. Now from here on it is like watching an inspiring movie.
Now you get to not just see but meet inspiring characters. Now you start feeling small, not because the movie screen is so big or the movie star is so gorgeous or because the locations are exotic, but because because you see so many others who have gone so so far in making a social difference. Movies that give us a message or make an attempt to show a good reflection of reality are applauded. But if it's only impact is applause and no action, it is indeed very less effective. For eg. After watching Pursuit of Happiness if not even a single man/woman made efforts to keep working hard for their dream, then of what good the movie be?
Similarly, now that you've seen the NGOs, you need to start working with at least one of them. You may really not have likes all the NGOs you visited, but when you visit several you will definitely find one which makes you feel that you are needed there and that you can add more value to their work. No, I am not referring to cash donations. Don't donate cash, but please donate your time for a good cause wherever and whenever you can. Donate your ideas, your sincerity, your integrity and most of all your will power to make a difference.
Trust yourself, you will feel so different and better, while working towards satisfying your self actualization need. Every achievement/failure will transform you for better more n more. Make a difference, to feel different!!
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Article Source: https://EzineArticles.com/expert/Shilpa_Kadam/557614
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